Why Will No-One Publish My Novel?

Why Will No-One Publish My Novel?

Fay Weldon’s Why Will No-One Publish My Novel? A Handbook For The Rejected Writer was a library find from this past weekend, but I’ll get my own copy now to keep on shelf beside the very few other writer’s how-to books I cherish like Stephen King’s On Writing (my favorite), Lawrence Block’s Writing The Novel From Plot To Print To Pixels, Elements Of Fiction by Walter Mosely or Writing Mysteries edited by Sue Grafton.

It would’ve been easy to browse right past this little gem of a book, only 4.5” x 7” with extra-heavy carboard covers like a children’s book. But I’m so glad I spotted it. Weldon’s book is a quick read, compiling a series of essays addressing the many, many reasons a writer’s projects are rejected (or simply overlooked), including all the common mistakes writers make from manuscript through submission, while also probing publishing industry issues that inevitably work against writers. The tone’s light-hearted and chatty, particularly in the first third of the book. Weldon’s wise words will get their share of knowing nods from writers in the trenches, cruel truths relayed along with more than a few chuckles. I challenge anyone – writer or not – not to laugh at Weldon’s imaginary literary agency meeting in her sixth chapter.

Fay Weldon Books

I often forego writer’s books that I probably ought to read, in-store skimming suggesting the content’s the same ol’ stuff and not worth the money, or just as often, unsure what I’ll learn from a how-to book’s author with a skimpy resume of their own (no shortage of those among Kindle and e-books). Maybe that’s why I keep returning for re-reads with King, Block, Grafton, Mosley and a few others. Fay Weldon may not be as familiar a name in the U.S as in the UK, but she’s been at it since the 1960’s, with thirty novels to her credit along with story collections, children’s books and non-fiction titles, all those following a career as an advertising copywriter and work in serial fiction, radio and teleplays. Oh yeah…and she was made a CBE, which makes her a Knight or a Lady (not sure which, but then we did fight a revolution over here so wouldn’t have to worry about those things). Suffice to say she’s been at it a while, knows what she’s talking about, and is generous with anecdotes throughout this book.

Why Will No-One Publish My Novel – A Handbook For The Rejected Writer came out in the UK in 2018, but took a while to pop up on my library’s shelf. (Technically, a nearby library. My library only has half a dozen writer’s books, if that.) I’ll be glad when I get my own copy – this one’s a keeper.

Death Is A Private Eye

Death Is A Private Eye

Apparently, Death Is A Private Eye – The Unpublished Stories Of Gil Brewer, a Stark House Press Noir Classics book edited by David Rachels, came out during the summer, but it didn’t get on my radar till right before Christmas. Still, the post-holiday season’s as good as any time to gift ourselves, and my Christmas stockings were woefully empty this year, so why not?

Fans of postwar era paperback original hard-boiled crime and so-called vintage sleaze books are surely aware of Gil Brewer, a kind of sad character whose life could form the makings of one of his own stories. A heavy drinker, Gil Brewer was still a prolific writer, and a promising career was launched at the beginning of the 1950’s under the guidance of former Black Mask editor and literary agent Joseph Shaw, who helped the writer sell several stories to the already dwindling crime pulp marketplace, and also sold three novels between 1950 and 1951. These included 13 French Street, which sold over a million copies. The story goes that Brewer was drying out in a sanitarium’s alcoholic ward when the publisher’s contract for that book arrived.

Only ten years later, Brewer’s mentor was gone, the writer just another me-too scribe in the notorious Scott Meredith agency roster, and his story and book sales were few and far between. Injured in a serious auto accident (driving drunk, not surprisingly), Brewer soon found himself cranking out low-pay sleaze and sex material, sales dwindling for even those with each year through his passing in 1983. At that point, his agent handed over cartons of unpublished submissions to his family, and volumes of Brewer’s papers were given to the University of Wyoming. The twenty short stories and two novellas in this Death Is A Private Eye collection were culled from that material, and the book includes an informative introduction from editor Rachels which you can read online if you want an advance look into this vintage writer’s life and work before ordering your own copy. Unlikely that you’ll see this title on shelf at your local book store, of course, but you can get it from the usual online sources or direct from the publisher at starkhousepress.com

The Adventures Of Bianca Dangereuse

The Wrong Girl

The cover art (a photocomposed piece by The Book Designers starting with a sumptuous Tetiana Lazunova photo) might make you think Donis Casey’s 2019 The Wrong Girl from Poisoned Pen Press is a romance or historical, but it’s a fooler. I saw the novel at more than one mystery fiction site, and though I hadn’t read any of Casey’s previous ten mysteries (the nineteen-teens Oklahoma-set Alafair Tucker mysteries), I planned to check it out. I was glad I did.

Split between pre-Dustbowl Oklahoma in 1921 and 1926 Hollywood, The Wrong Girl tells the story of rural small-town teen Blanche Tucker and the perilous adventures that lead her to Hollywood, then later, stardom as the mysterious fan-favorite Bianca Dangereuse, a silent film era daredevil adventuress and real life enigma. Chapters juxtapose Blanche/Bianca’s trek from desolate farmlands to the Hollywood Hills in 1921, with L.A. private eye Ted Oliver’s investigation into the discovery five years later of the skeletal remains of one Graham Peyton. Oliver’s digging into the death of that notorious rake, pimp and all-around hood for a local crime lord, while film star Bianca Dangereuse takes a peculiar interest in the case.

Writers accustomed to having their knuckles wrapped about the whole “show-don’t-tell” thing might be put off at first by author Donis Casey’s habit to tell. And tell and tell and tell and tell some more. But it works because Casey’s a very good storyteller, and The Wrong Girl reads like the writer is telling the story herself. In person. Some of it reads like a traditional vintage P.I. novel, some like a 1920’s silent adventure film. Neither cozy nor hard-boiled, the novel doesn’t fit neatly into any mystery/crime fiction sub-genre, (complete with silent film style title cards liberally inserted throughout the text) and whatever type of mystery-adventure tale you decide to call it, I bet you plow through this 230-page quick-read with a smile. I did. Casey closes The Wrong Girl with some narrative threads clearly unresolved and the tease: “Join us next time to find the answers to these questions and many others as we continue the adventures of Bianca Dangereuse, Episode 2”.

Okay, I’ll be there.

Resolutions: None. Only An Agenda.

New Years Eve 2020

With that clock ticking closer to midnight, this duo looked more apprehensive than enthusiastic. Perhaps, like many, they failed to make a suitable list of New Year’s resolutions for 2020.

Count me among that lot.

I have no resolutions for this new decade (which I realize technically doesn’t commence until 2021), knowing from prior experience that I’d never keep them anyway. My vices are few, drinking modestly (if even that), donut shop coffee my drug of choice, reasonably thrifty, diligent in the day job, unfailingly (and happily) faithful in my relationship.

Confession: I smoke, and resolving to quit would be the very best resolution. But I know I won’t, at least not now, so why kid myself? So then…what else? Eat healthy? Exercise more? Be more charitable, kinder to strangers, start going to church?

I don’t do resolutions, but I do have an agenda for 2020.  Not so different than my 2019 agenda, with some tweaks to my writing endeavors: Table The Stiletto Gumshoe’s sequel temporarily, concluding it’s presumptuous to work on the second book of a planned series when the first hasn’t even been sold, much less agented yet. But the agenda includes a refusal to lose heart while continuing the humbling (or soul-crushing) querying process. It’s not rejections that sting. Those are fairly few and, often enough, come with genuinely encouraging remarks. It’s the non-responses that bruise some, and it seems they’ve become the industry norm. But the agenda’s full with short fiction projects for The Stiletto Gumshoe and other things, coupled with a renewed zeal to pay more attention to short fiction markets, contests and competitions, anemic or non-existent compensation aside. Keeping up with all that while aiming for some better balance of ‘real’ writing time and lazy-ass blog-hobbying time is enough of an agenda for my 2020. So, here’s hoping for a happy and productive 2020, for me and all of you!

No Christmas Cozies Here.

Hard boiled christmas stories

I’ll skip Dickens’ A Christmas Carol again this year and just do a re-read (or at least a thorough re-browse) of Reverse Karma Press’ 146-page trade pb Hard-Boiled Christmas Stories, collecting multiple holiday-themed stories from the 1930’s – 1940’s pulp magazine heyday.

The anthology includes crooked Santa Clauses (spell-check, please), holiday homicides and seasonal scams from John K. Butler (writer of the hard-boiled L.A. cabbie Steve Midnight tales), Steve Fisher (1941’s I Wake Up Screaming), Henry Leverage (editor of Sing Sing prison’s in-house publication, where he was a ‘resident’), West Pointer Lt. John Hopper, newspaperman Jack Kofoed, and several others. The book leads off with a Dan Turner – Hollywood Detective yarn, but not by Turner’s creator Robert Leslie Bellem, this homage tale penned instead by the anthology’s editor John Wooley, who also edited the first-ever Dan Turner collection. I’ve talked about my love affair with Robert Leslie Bellem’s sing-songy slang-filled snappy banter before, and Wooley does the artful word-smith’s style justice here in “Santa’s Slay Ride”. Why no Bellem original? Though he knocked out literally hundreds of Dan Turner short stories and comics scripts, the Hard-Boiled Christmas Stories editors concluded that Bellem had never written a Christmas story for the hard-boiled Hollywood private eye. Go figure.

I don’t know why Santa Claus and his elves would want to leave a 1930’s pulp cover style damsel-in-distress all ‘wrapped up’ under the Christmas tree, but that cover art was done by David Saunders, son of the late pulp, paperback and pinup illustrator Norm Saunders, intended to emulate the familiar style of mystery and crime pulp maestro H.J. Ward.

 

 

Easy Death

Easy Death

Think of this 2014 Hard Case Crime paperback as the perfect noir-pulp-hard-boiled enthusiast’s stocking stuffer, particularly since you can still get it new. In Daniel Boyd’s Easy Death, which is set during Christmastime in 1951, two tough guys are hired by a crime boss to rob an armored car. The heist comes off sorta-kinda okay, but a December blizzard screws up their getaway. It pretty much hinders the pursuing police as well, of course, but not so much the female park ranger who becomes involved.

Written by a former real-life cop, Daniel Boyd’s (a pen name, I think) prior novel was a well-received western. His Easy Death is a fast read, action-filled and with a surprising amount of dark humor. But more surprising still is that it actually manages to feel quite ‘Christmasy’ (in its way), even though it’s pure hard-boiled crime fiction throughout.

Like most Hard Case Crime novels, Easy Death is wrapped in eye-catching cover art, this one from the legendary Glen Orbik. Since the book came out less than a year before the artist’s untimely death at only 52, it likely was among his last works.

 

Maybe Next Year…

Maybe Next Christmas

No, The Stiletto Gumshoe won’t be in anyone’s Christmas stocking this year, least of all mine. Perhaps I spent 2019 being naughty when I should’ve been nice. Still, I’m thinking positive thoughts for 2020, and am one of those naive types who truly believe that diligence pays off (even if I’ve been proven wrong in the past). So I know what I hope to find under my tree next year: Not baubles or bangles. Just a book, and one book in particular…

The New Yorker

New Yorker 1997

A holiday homicide cover by San Francisco artist Owen Smith for the December 22nd and 29th 1997 issue of The New Yorker – The Fiction Issue.

Not sure if Smith has been a go-to artist for The New Yorker’s fiction issues, but he has done nearly twenty covers for that publication alone, and below is the Christmas and New Year’s Day issue from the previous year – that one more New Year’s celebratory instead of Xmas. The guy and the gal hunched over their typewriters got it all over the revelers, if you ask me.

The New Yorker 1996

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